You know it and I know it: the apocalyptic wars of the future will be fought using telekenetic powers. It’s an inevitability we’ve just come to accept, and finally it seems Ubisoft is on the same page.

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Just like its cavalcade of LIPS commercials, Microsoft is attempting to capture the “family fun” vibe of Nintendo adverts, while somehow managing to be even more humiliating. Where do they find the actors for these things? There must be some secret island where humans are born and bred to be contemptible … but so very beautiful … homunculi of humiliation.

Some might say it’s unfair to rip apart a video that’s not intended for our demographic, and somewhat elitist or smug to look down on the kinds of people suckered in by such shallow and vapid advertising since they don’t know any better. I would completely agree with that assessment.

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Its been seen a hundred times but its that time of year.

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I never thought I’d be writing this, but Dell (yes, Dell), is charging customers a monthly fee to have access to its United States-based customer service representatives.

The Washington Post reported on Thursday that the Computer maker is charging customers with a Dell account $12.95 per month to have access to an American agent or $99 per year for customers who purchase a new Computer from the company.

Those who don’t pay the sum will be contacting center agents in India or the Philippines. But before you begin your bellyaching, Dell is sweetening the pot: wait times are guaranteed to be 2 or fewer minutes!

Great. Thanks, Dell.

A Dell representative told the Post that the company has “heard from customers that it’s hard to understand a particular accent and that they couldn’t comprehend the instructions they were getting.” Because of that, the company has instituted the policy to “illustrate Dell’s commitment to customer choice.”

This mouthpiece (and Dell, for that matter) is kidding, right? The company is charging us for access to American customer support agents on products we bought from it that went wrong? What a joke.

…

source The Digital Home

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Good old Microsoft. Just as it hiked up the price of most “top tier” XBLA games to 1200 Microsoft Points, it reveals the 800 MS Point card. Yes, that would have been handy six months ago.

The 800 Point card is priced as $9.99, and I suppose it will be handy for Community Games, once Destructoid has found all the good ones for you. Outside of that though, I can only see this as Microsoft giving you a giftwrapped present, only to open it up and find a hairy poo inside. One of those poos squirted out after someone has swallowed a load of bubblegum, so it’s slightly off-color and extra stringy.

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